Written By Eugene Morgan

Milton Erickson often tells stories to aid in helping his patients to make changes.  Most of his stories are about accomplishing goals and overcoming obstacles.  He wants his listeners to identify with a character, thus experiencing what the character is experiencing.   In a way, Erickson is getting his listeners to create a sense of freedom.  He designs his stories to help break up rigid ideas and to stir up emotions.  Breaking up rigid ideas means freeing up new ideas, and stirring up emotions means freeing up different emotions.  Erickson says, “I win championships out of my wheelchair, daily.”   Although Erickson is confined to a wheelchair, he finds ways to carry out his goals.  He doesn’t allow the wheelchair to define him; rather he defines the wheelchair as just a tool to get around.

Understanding Self-Doubt

Erickson throughout his career in working with patients encounters the issue of self-doubt.   Self-doubt creates the feeling of lack of freedom.  No one likes to be tied down, and self-doubt can tie us down.   It keeps us from doing what we want to do.  Self-determination doesn’t exist when we’re in the state of self-doubt.  Our attention is focused on what we can’t do, so we won’t even attempt doing what we what to do in our lives.  Because of this, it narrows the range of possibilities for doing what we want to do.   Self-doubt is a mental habit; it can fill a person’s mind.  A mental habit of self-doubt can trickle down into fear or anxiety and create a behavior of non-action towards a goal.

Some of these behaviors we may be exhibiting are: distractions, procrastination, making excuses or making justifications.   Erickson creates a climate of getting patients and/or students to trust him, which in turns creates self-trust and self-reliance, which is a prerequisite to freely doing what we want to do and to discovering what we can do.

Trusting and Relying on Self

Before Erickson can do anything to help a patient, he first has to build rapport, which requires the patient’s trust.   He wants the patient to trust him so that the patient feels comfortable responding.  One approach Erickson uses to get the patient to trust him is to expand the patient’s viewpoint by reminding her about something she already knows.

For example, he would say something like “We don’t know what was the first thing we learned as infants, but we were learning rapidly about the world around us. We heard different sounds, sniffed different smells, seen different objects, and felt different textures. We learned the difference between hot and cold, wet and dry, dark and light, a shout and a whisper, etc.”

By hearing the above quote the listeners may have developed an unconscious search.  Once the unconscious search activates the listeners’ unconscious mind will bring about some of those experiences to forefront of the listeners’ conscious minds.  If the listeners begin, such as, to smell a certain fragrant or favorite food from their pasts, this is clearly self-proof that their unconscious minds have responded.   Erickson only guided patients by stimulating their unconscious minds to do most of the work.

Permissive Attitude

While Erickson has a permissive attitude towards his patients and students, I also think it is helpful to have a permissive attitude toward ourselves.   How do we know what we can do if we don’t try it?  But before we can try something new or challenging we need a permissive attitude.  It’s all right to be permissive and fail.  Failure isn’t who we are.  Failure is just a barometer or a feedback of where we are.  It’s not always about trying harder either.  Feedback is information that can be useful, like finding another way.  Having a permissive attitude can free us from self-doubts and uncertainties.

Discovering What We Can Do

“When one knows the boundaries, restrictions and limitations that governs them he is free to utilize satisfactorily whatever is available.” (Milton Erickson)    In other words, test the boundaries, restrictions and limitations that we have so that we can discover what we can do.

In my last post, Discovery Our Uniqueness, under the heading “Find Our Contribution To Humanity” I quoted Milton Erickson, “I always enjoy discovering what I can do.”    One of the primary goals in life is the enjoyment of our freedom.  We need to push through our struggles, push through hardships, and push through difficult tasks, which are done through self-determination.

Self-Determination

Once we have tested the boundaries, restrictions and limitations thus discovering what we can do, we can decide if we want to do it again.   We can feel confident in ourselves that will increase our self-trust and self-reliability and thus decrease self-doubts, anxieties and fears.

Freedom

Self-Determination can lead to freedom.   Can freedom lead to self-determination?   When there was slavery in America, some slaves were self-determined to be free.  Some tried to escape and some succeeded.   However other slaves who wanted to be free were afraid to push the boundaries and limitations.  They waited to be freed.

So when slavery was abolished these former slaves who waited to be freed did not know what they wanted while those who did push the boundaries to be free knew what they wanted.

Written By Eugene Morgan

Trusting Your Unconscious

When it comes to solving a problem you can’t solve consciously or going through life difficulties, trust your unconscious mind.  When Dr.  Erickson saw a patient he did not plan on how he would facilitate change in that person.  He waited until the patient gave him some kind of stimulus.  He trusted his own unconscious mind to know what to say and when to say it and how to say it.   This was the result of countless hours in a laboratory observing and experimenting with his subjects.

Milton Erickson, “I don’t need to know what your problem is for you to correct it.”  Just in this quote he’s implying that the subject can trust his/her own unconscious mind and that the unconscious mind can correct the problem.  We all have lifetime experiences of  problem solving.     When we don’t have an answer, we can let our unconscious mind search and process one.

For example, have you ever worked on a puzzle or problem, but can’t seem to solve it at that moment.  You then take a break from it.  You start doing other things, like walking the dog or washing the dishes.  Then all of a sudden,  a flash of light goes on  inside your head like  illuminating a dark room when you turn on a light switch.   It becomes clear to you the answer.   In this the example, you did something that you didn’t know you were doing that we do all the time.  You stopped trying to find an answer.  But your unconscious mind continued searching while you were doing something else.

Another example, telling a colleague at work about a great movie you have seen over the weekend but you just can’t seem to recall the name of the well-known actor who played in it.  Although at home, while eating dinner,  you recalled the actor’s name.

Your Unconscious Storehouse

Another good reason to trust your unconscious mind is that it has a storehouse of experiences, learnings and memories.  Dr. Milton Erickson said to his students, patients, and colleagues to trust your unconscious mind.  In previous post, I talked about what is the difference between conscious and unconscious mind. The one thing that was evident in that post was that the unconscious knows more than what we know consciously.  When we learn something new, it is learned consciously. The end result of all conscious learnings ends up in the storehouse of the unconscious mind.   “You all can walk, yet you really don’t know the movements or the processes,” Milton Erickson.

Your Unconscious Can Change

Some say that we are unconsciously predetermined.  Does this means we can’t change?  But do you know your unconscious can change? The unconscious mind changes after reading a good inspirational book.  The unconscious mind is altered after watching a feel good movie.  The unconscious mind changes after meeting someone you regard as a model to live up to.  The unconscious mind changes after learning something new.

Written by Eugene Morgan

Zen Story

A farmer was fortunate to have one horse, unlike most people in his village.    One day the farmer’s horse ran away.  Because it was a small village the news spread quickly about the runaway horse.  One of the neighbors said to the farmer, “I am so sorry for your loss, that’s unfortunate.”   “Maybe,” replied the farmer.   However, the next morning the horse returned to the farm with two wild horses.  Again the news spread about the farmer having his returned horse along with two more wild horses.  Another neighbor said to the farmer, “This is wonderful news, lets us celebrate.”   “Maybe,” the farmer replied.  The next day, the farmer’s son tried to ride on one of the wild horses.  But the son was thrown from the horse and broke his leg.  Upon hearing about his son’s accident, the neighbors offered sympathy.  “Maybe,” replied the farmer.   On the same day, a group of recruiters happened to arrive to the village searching for young men to draft for war.  One of the recruiters happened to pass up the farmer’s son because of his broken leg.  One neighbor saw this and displayed his joy in front of the farmer.  “Maybe,” replied the farmer.

The Conscious vs. The Unconscious Mind

This is one of my favorite Zen stories because it illustrates a primary difference between the conscious and the unconscious mind.    In the story, the conscious mind represents the neighbors and the unconscious mind represents the farmer.  The events that took place in the Zen story, the neighbors responded with interpretations based on personal criteria of what was fortunate or unfortunate, and, with the farmer responded with the word, “Maybe” based on no criteria of what was fortunate or unfortunate.    The unconscious mind does not perceive events bad, good or indifferent.  It just perceives and processes events.  However, the conscious mind does perceive events— bad, good or indifferent.  Blinded with interpretations, judgments, and rigid frames of reference— what makes the conscious mind non-objective.   This is what gets us into trouble and creates problems.   But the unconscious mind perceives things as they are just as the farmer did in the story; he saw the events that were taking place as is.  “People who accomplish a great many things are people who have freed themselves from biases. These are the creative people,” Milton Erickson.  In other words, creative people have learned how to tap into their unconscious mind.

So the unconscious mind perceives and processes events beyond the conscious perception. The conscious mind is not aware of the unconscious but the unconscious is very much aware of the conscious mind.   “The unconscious works without your knowledge and that is the way it prefers,” Milton Erickson.  And it’s impossible to remember every thing we have learned consciously.  Most of our learnings are transferred to the unconscious mind.

Emotions and The Unconscious Mind

What about our emotions?  Where does our emotions come from? The emotions come from the unconscious mind, not the conscious mind.  Our unconscious mind tells us consciously how we feel about a situation.  It paints a picture of the events that are taking place around us.   “We should be willing to feel fully the pleasures and the happiness that we want, because all our feelings are done by ourselves.  In a similar way many emotional problems can be solved more easily without conscious thinking.” Milton Erickson.

Nonverbal Learning and The Unconscious Mind

Before we were able to communicate verbally, we first learned how to communicate non-verbally. When we first saw a smiling face, we began to learn how to smile back. When we first saw a frowning face we began to learn how to frown. The unconscious mind learned the facial patterns of a smile, before we could smile back. Generally, when someone smiles at us, we automatically elicit a smile. And this creates a feeling of joy. Just as a frown face creates feeling of sadness. We have all experience this.

Logic and the Conscious vs. The Unconscious Mind

The unconscious mind is spontaneous, intuitive, and understands metaphors and symbols, while the conscious mind is logical, rational and abstract.  Milton Erickson observed in subjects that, although, the learning is a difficult process for the conscious mind, the unconscious mind does the lion’s share of the work.

For example, teaching a child how to ride a bike for the first time is difficult.   We would think, since most of us know how to ride a bike, therefore,  we can teach easily a child how to as well.  Since it’s easy to ride a bike, we can easily teach a child how to ride a bike.  But we forget that when we first learned how to ride a bike it was very difficult.  There were many variables that we had to learn.  We had to learn how to keep our balance on the bike without falling, learn how to use eye and hand coördination and learn how to use the muscles in our legs that we normally don’t use to push the pedals.  And we had learn how to do all these things simultaneously.

Therefore, the child has to learn how to ride a bike through experience.  The child has to learn how to get on a bike.  Even though you are holding up the bike, the child has to learn first the feel of the bike; adjust herself to the seat of the bike while both feet are on the pedals.  We can only guide her by holding and pushing the bike until she gets use to it.  For her to learn how to keep her balance on the bike, she would have to ride it without us holding her up. This means falling a dozen times before she learns the experience of riding a bike.

Regulating systems and the Unconscious Mind

“Human beings, once they have learned anything, transfer this learning to the forces that govern their bodies,” Milton Erickson.  The unconscious mind is responsible for regulating all systems such as the nervous system, digestive system, circulatory system, urinary system and the reproductive system, and etc.,
Click this button for my new book:

Written by Eugene Morgan

A dying farmer said to his two sons, “I don’t have much longer to live.  I have buried something in the vineyard and I want you to find it after I am gone.  If you do find it, then I have given you all that I have.”  The sons thought the father meant some kind of treasure in the vineyard.  So after the father died, the sons went to the vineyard and took a spade and dug thoroughly every inch but found no treasure.  That summer the vineyard had harvested a large crop of grapes.

This is one of my favorite fables.  What do you think is the moral of the story?  I think many of you would say that the moral of the story is the fruit of hard labor,  is the treasure.  I think the treasure is something else.  But before I tell you what I think is the treasure how did the farmer get his sons to work?  It was the sons’ switch in  mindsets that propelled them to work.  In the sons’ minds they were digging for treasure not plowing the vineyard to grow grapes.  When the father said, “I have buried ‘something’ in the vineyard.  The sons had filled in the gap of what they thought “something” meant.  Based on the sons past experience “something” meant treasure.  The father knew his sons well enough not to tell them if they work the vineyard they would be rewarded for a large harvest of grapes.  Instead, he had to find a way to motivate them to do something in the vineyard.

According to Milton Erickson, “Your unconscious contains a vast repository of experiences forged with integrity.”  For example, in order to read and write, we first have to learn the alphabets.  At the beginning it is a difficult task to learn the difference between a lowercase ‘d’ and a lowercase ‘b’ and to remember to dot the ‘i’ or cross the ‘t’.  After learning all 26 letters of the alphabet, we begin learning to put letters into words; words like “apple”, “bat”, “cat” and “dog.”  We begin to place meaning by the use of word-and-picture match exercise.  For example, we would learn to match a picture of a dog to the word ‘dog’.  This creates in our unconscious mind a link between the two: the picture and the word.  When we read, “The dog is wagging its tail” we base it on a lifetime of experience.   We automatically elicit an image of a dog wagging its tail in our minds’ eye.   My image of a dog wagging its tail would look differently from someone else’s image of a dog wagging its tail.  My image of a dog might be a bulldog versus someone else’s image of a dog, a German Shepard.  Again this is based on different past experiences.    Once we learn something, it becomes automatic. These learnings goes to the back of the mind so to speak.   “All your lives you have been learning things, transferring them to your unconscious, and using, automatically….” Milton Erickson

Experiential learnings became unconscious learnings.  So what do I mean by unconscious learnings.  I mean that all your experiential learnings are stored up in your unconscious mind.  Before you were able to learn how to walk, you first had to learn how to crawl.  Before you were able to learn how to crawl, you first had to learn how to move your legs and feet.  So learning how to move your legs and feet took a conscious effort.  After you’ve learned how to move your legs and feet consciously, the learning became unconscious – experiential learning.   Milton Erickson rediscovered this experiential learning when he was struck with polio.  Milton Erickson had to relearn how to move his toes, move his right and left legs while  watching  his baby sister learn how to walk for the first time.

I believe this is where the treasure lies.  You carry the treasure within you.  It’s in your unconscious mind.    The father from the fable was wise to find something in  his sons’ past experience to motivate them.   The treasure lies within his sons.

We have a tendency to look externally for help with our problems.   But Milton Erickson’s primary goal was to have his patients find solutions from within so as to make healthy changes in their lives.